BYB Sunday: No Debt Load

Welcome to Blog Your Blessings Sunday.

I've been reading a lot lately about how people nationwide are struggling financially as gas and food prices rise. The stimulus payments that will start to flow to Americans tomorrow will, by necessity, go to help fill the gap these higher prices are causing. I realize steep inflation is forewarned in the Bible, but living through it doesn't make it easier.

When the Lamb opened the third seal, I heard the third living creature say, "Come!" I looked, and there before me was a black horse! Its rider was holding a pair of scales in his hand. Then I heard what sounded like a voice among the four living creatures, saying, "Two pounds of wheat for a day's wages, and six pounds of barley for a day's wages, and do not damage the oil and the wine!" Revelation 6:5-6 TNIV

Complaining (again) yesterday about our tiny home and how hard it is to keep clean when it seems gremlins follow me to mess up what I fix, my understanding opened. Many people right now carry vehicle loans and mortgages, and as prices skyrocket, it becomes harder to pay for them.

I may never like this sardine can of a house, but it's time for me to once again count my blessings that we fully own our vehicles, land, mobile home, and house under construction. And because we followed what God showed us and did not get a loan or charge credit for building supplies to get in our house sooner, we don't have debt making it even tougher to pay the essentials.

Living in 800 square feet with eight people and a Great Dane may challenge us and make me want to scream at times, but at least the added stress of losing the little we have does not exist like it has for us before and does now for others.

Thank You, God, for this. It is a blessing indeed.

But what if you have that mortgage, loans, or car payments choking you? Is there blessing you can find when you're feeling strangled by gas and food prices?

I believe there is, but like beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so are blessings. These you must search out and find yourself. (Try asking God, first.) In the mean time, take heart. Spring is upon us and there's no finer time to learn to plant a garden or manage indoor vegetable-bearing plants to help ease the cost of food. And to look into hydrogen powered cars fueled by water... (Jim's new hobby)

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Tech Tags: food ~ gas ~ price increase ~ inflation ~ stress ~ blessing ~ finances ~ struggle

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Devastating Vehicle Accidents Today

My heart is breaking today.

On the news, I saw that an eight-year-old girl was seriously injured this morning in a nearby town when an 86-year-old man lost control of his vehicle after dropping off his wife for Super Tuesday voting. His vehicle pinned the second grader to the outside wall of her elementary school. Worse, her classmates saw it and are coping today with the fear and worry for their friend.

Everyone, including the man, must also be devastated. According to reports, his gas pedal stuck. If he were wearing clunky boots, that can happen easily.

And then Jim calls me from travel on the interstate this afternoon. (Slushy ice storm last night made roads a mess today.) A tractor trailer truck lost control of his truck this morning, hit guard rails on a bridge, and part or all of it went over. I don't know if his truck first dangled on the edge allowing him to escape before he plummeted to the street below. If he was unable to escape, he is certainly dead.

(Update: Jim just came home with reports from someone who lived nearby who said he heard the man screaming for help, but no one could reach him before he burned to death.)

I just passed that intersection last night on the way home from errands and recalled a dream I'd had as a young girl where I drove off the bridge to visit a friendly monster at the bottom of a whirlpool. As I drove by (it was a different section of the Interstate), I prayed God would never let my vehicle go over the side because it would be instant (hopefully) death. I feel like kicking myself. Why didn't I pray that God not allow any vehicle to go over at any bridge of the highway. Did I? I might have. And if I had, would it have made a difference?

How was I to know that very thing would happen the next morning--today? I feel awful. Awful for the driver, awful for the girl and her family and friends and school, awful for the elderly couple. I know none of it is my fault, and I could not have foreseen the bridge accident today on my own, but it still hurts to see such pain and torment. And I feel like I should have taken the memory more seriously than just a recall and prayed harder.

All I can do now is pray and hope.

Funny how prayer seems so helpless sometimes. I know its the best thing we can do in all circumstances, but it's so hard to do only that when we want to rush out and fix things ourselves. We have to submit our concerns, worries, and fears to God and trust that He hears us, listens to our requests, sees our requests as valid and important, and will act. And then we have to trust God's response and timing in His response.

How much easier it is to do things ourselves. But we can't. Even when we can, God still asks us to pray and trust Him alongside what we can and should do to help. How hard. But how important.

God does move in response to our prayers. I can only hope He will do a miracle in this little girl's body today.

Please pray for these people.

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Technorati Tags: tragedy ^ accident ^ kids ^ vehicle ^ prayer

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BYB Sunday: Mobile Home Holding Up

Welcome to Blog Your Blessings Sunday.

We're completing year three in this mobile home and even though it is still small and things have broken down and fallen apart during this time, I'm tremendously grateful for the roof over our head and that the mobile home continues to stand up under the continual beating of six boisterous kids while we pray lots for money and building supplies and do what we can to begin building again.

(Boy, was that ever a long sentence!) This is answer to prayer that we walk in daily--literally.

Thank you God the roof is still up, the floors haven't fallen through, the ants haven't eaten it to sawdust, the bugs went away, the sink faucet works (yes, the handle is still broken), the roof leaks no more and some less, and we somehow manage to stay cool in the summer and warm in the winter (a miracle in itself in this trailer).

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Technorati Tags:  blessing ^ Sunday ^ bugs ^ mobile home ^ broken

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Visiting our stagnant house-under-contruction

As I brought back NT from school camp today, he said, "Mama, I want to move into our big house now."

My heart sank a little. I want to move into our big house now, too.

When we got home, I did something I've yearned to do for awhile, now. I went into the framed house. I brought NT with me.

We walked through the downstairs where the bedrooms will be and talked about whose bedrooms they might be. NT told me which room he wanted and I showed him the future playroom. Then we ventured up the ladder to the main part of the house on the second floor. The walls are partly framed only for the master bedroom and bath/closet, the latter which I hope I can convince Jim to change. The rest I helped NT imagine.

As we walked through, my heart ached. Now that the kids are a year older and our Great Dane at seven months old is growing very big, our small trailer has shrunk dramatically. Diesel knocks down the younger kids just trying to turn around in the TV room when they are there. He can't help it. Neither can the kids.

I hope that at the end of this roofing season we will once again have money to buy building supplies with, for this year my dad closed his roofing business of over 25 years to enter a partnership with Jim under a new name and we'll earn half the net profit.

Even though the wait has been long and seemingly never ending, there truly is hope on the horizon. I always knew there was even when I couldn't see it, because I could see God and trusted He had a plan. Today I'm glad I can once again see the hope I've been retaining for so long.

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Technorati Tags:  family ^ hope ^ waiting ^ house construction ^ building

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BYB Sunday: My husband

Welcome to Blog Your Blessings Sunday.

Jim and I married when we were 19 and 20 years old. Some said we shouldn't get married, and others said we wouldn't last longer than a year. Fourteen years later, against statistics, we are still together.

Life hasn't been easy. We disagree a lot and get in each other's way frequently, especially in this small house, but we are committed to God and each other. Today I'm more thankful for my husband than I've ever been. It's not that he's become a super guy over the years, though he's done a lot of changing for the good, but it's more that I'm learning to see my husband as God sees him and love him as God has loved me.

I've screwed up life so well that I don't deserve anything good I have. Yet God loved me through my garbage. He didn't deal with me according to my sin as He could have, but he scolded me when necessary in love to help me see the error of my ways, and then nurtured me back from a dark pit to life in Him far more times than I can count. And he keeps doing it. How can I not do the same for my husband no matter what disagreements or strife we experience? I am no better than he is.

Besides, I don't want to throw away the years we've invested in each other to start over with someone else. No way!

My husband is one of the best blessings God has given me for a multitude of reasons:

• He keeps me humble
• He loves me
• He's handsome
• He's my life companion
• I can trust Him
• He's my sandpaper guy to smooth my rough spots
• He challenges my faith
• And more

What about your spouse, if you have one? I bet your spouse is one of your biggest blessings too, even if you haven't been able to see it in a while. Take a moment to write three blessings you have from your spouse. You'll be glad you did.

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Technorati Tags:  Blog Your Blessings Sunday ^ marriage ^ spouse ^ husband ^ thankful

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Crazy Weather, Stark Realization

It's the second week of April and it's snowing. There is something wrong with that. It's supposed to be ending mud season and buds on the trees should begin showing. We're scheduled for 7-10" of snow today, and another bucket load of either snow or rain on Monday. What's wrong with the weather???

Yesterday was beautiful. Mud season had passed, the ground finally firm, and we could go outside with a sweater and be comfortable. Today outside is a cold mess.

Whenever I see crazy weather it reminds me that the earth is aging and all of this will pass away:

"But when you hear of wars and rumors of wars, do not be troubled; for such things must happen, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be earthquakes in various places, and there will be famines and troubles. These are the beginning of sorrows." (Mark 13:7-8)

"Lift up your eyes to the heavens, and look on the earth beneath. For the heavens will vanish away like smoke, the earth will grow old like a garment, and those who dwell in it will die in like manner; but My salvation will be forever, and My righteousness will not be abolished." (Isaiah 51:6)

So even though I'm not crazy in love with snow in April, it's a good reminder for me that this life here is temporal and so I must be about the business God called me to. It fits right in with the last night's Bible Study topic from John Bevere's Driven By Eternity study. (Excellent study everyone should do.)

Essentially, this world is passing away, and we will all be held accountable for our actions when it does. Unbelievers will be judged according to what they did, but really stuck with was the clear truth that believers will be judged not according to what they did, but according to what they were supposed to do.

I don't even have to ask myself where I stand. I know. Shamefully. I am called to write and have been skirting it terribly, in favor of--ahem--blogging which is easier with quicker rewards.

It's time for this Building Brow to start building the right thing, so I'll now get off this post, let the snow in April remind me of my temporal status here, stop checking blog stats and whatnot, and get on with my business--home preschool my son, write another column, and edit a children's story.

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Technorati Tags:  weather ^ snow ^ April ^ earth ^ Bevere ^ Bible study

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BYB Sunday: Appreciation Anew

On my way to church, this morning, I came upon bottlenecked traffic at an underpass about a mile down the road. As I approached, I saw fire trucks. The car in front of me was trying to turn onto the road, so I drove around. On the way by, I saw more fire trucks surrounding the first house on the right.

I recognized that house. It was the one I had admired as I grew up for it's size, modern country design, and natural wood exterior. More important, it was the one my son SM identified last year as "A's house," the girl he felt constantly irritated by for the entire first grade.

My heart sunk as I thought of her and how she looked sad in SM's class photo. I prayed for the family for the rest of the morning and knew that as soon as I got home, I would tell SM to pray, too. I hoped it would soften his heart toward A even though he'd said nothing about her irritating him this year now that she was in a different second grade.

This Blog Your Blessings Sunday I am suddenly grateful anew for my home, my family, necessities, and the extras that I possess by God's grace. And I'm strangely aware that I have the blessing of recapturing that appreciation while I still have those things.


"You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone."

It doesn't have to be that way. We can know now what we've got, before a fire or death strikes. Reminders are all around us if we will but look.
 

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Building on the Trailer?

I'm a little excited. Since yesterday's fiasco with the sandy winter gear I had to clean up just to see the front door, Jim's hashed numbers and is right now out pricing material to build not just an entry way, but a 8'x14' extension. He reasoned that if he had to spend $500 worth of materials on an entry way, he might as well spend a few extra more for a place for the kids to sleep to get them out of the TV room.

Since selling our Jetta, we're able to do this, and even though we'd like to put the money into the house, realistically, it's a wise investment to help us keep sane.

I hesitate to really think about an extra room and outer wear storage. Could it really be? No. Can't go there. Must stay focused and keep cleaning.

On the up side, I've finally crawled out from underneath Christmas mess. With the tree out of the house and a foam bed thrown away (and another rocking chair shipped off to Dad's for storage) I can actually walk in our TV room again. Yay!

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Time? Time! Time.

Where has the time gone? What have I been doing with myself? Where are the stories and articles I was supposed to have written by now?

These questions swept through my mind as I swept sand into my dustpan for the third time that day. Evaluation of the way I've spent my time the past few months--this past year--brought shocking revelation. All I do is pick up and clean, and pick up and clean what I've already picked up and cleaned. I spend about 70 percent of my waking hours on meaningless chores.

In an average house, I wouldn't have to do so much, but because we live in a mobile home, narrow hallways and cramped entry ways demand clutter-free floors for passage. And sand necessitates several sweeping sessions to keep it from grinding underfoot or falling into the register despite that all shoes come off at the door. Let's face it, shoes for eight people just don't fit into three square feet of space, even if four feet high. And of course, what I've done at the beginning the day, I turn around later to find one of my kids has undone in a big way.

No wonder I feel like I have nothing to show for a day's work. I keep doing the same meaningless tasks over and over that look like it should have taking maybe an hour tops to complete.

Last night in bed, after six hours cleaning the four hours of house cleaning my kids undid midday, I recalled living in our former house we thought then was small. Ha! It had THREE bedrooms, TWO bathrooms, sixteen square feet of closet space for coats and footwear, and a dishwasher. The electronic kind.

So, all that extra chore duty each day leaves 30 percent of my waking hours to eat, bathe, spend family time, read, pray, and perhaps try to write and read e-mail. So you should be proud of me for making this post. I managed to cut out sleep to do it! (Bad Brandy.)

I make this post, though, with a gleam in my eye, for after painstakingly cleaning up the sandy mud mess of five coats, snow pants, boots, hats, and mittens and the muddy entryway no one could pass through once my kids stopped trying to slide down the inch of snow on the dirt hill, I think Jim's pretty convinced we need to construct an entry way outside the trailer to store coats and shoes.

I might get back some of my time yet. Here's to a new year with hope on the horizon. :)

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A Gift from Missey Gray

I just learned from Heather Ivester's blog about Missey Gray's untimely death giving birth to her fifth child. (You can read more about her passing here.) I'm stunned and humbled, and I'm reminded that life is fragile. God has gifted me with six children, but it's so easy to take childbirth and so many other things for granted.

It really struck me as I read Missey's blog posted March 1st just hours before she passed. One minute she was with us, and the next minute she was gone. How I feel for her husband Tom and their children, and how much more I realize I can't take anything in my life for granted. Life is too precious. People are too precious.

Thank you, Missey, for reminding me just when I needed it. How I pray God will use you to remind others, too.

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Mama's On Strike

No more fighting, no more back talk, no more blatant disobedience. I'm done. As of today I'm on strike from motherhood.

Today the kids changed their brother's diapers and made their own food including scrambled eggs (they cracked, scrambled, and cooked them, and did mighty fine, I might add) and hamburgers. (Separate meals, of course) They cleaned up the stove, table, and floor knowing Mama wasn't going to do it and Daddy would not be happy with a messy house when he came home.

For a change they are beginning to see how much I do for them. My rebellious eleven-year-old commented, "Now I know what it's like to be an adult." Ha! He mostly played the Game Boy all day and made a meal only once. In fact, he chose not to eat lunch instead of make himself food. His nine-year old sister did most of the work today. She did well taking care of her and her brothers. I'm very proud of her.

This strike won't last much longer, but I desperately needed a break. And the kids needed a dose of thankfulness injected into them.

I still haven't picked up my knitting needles yet--something about the hassle of not having the right sizes that's putting me off (have 5 double-pointed needles in sizes 1, 3, or 5 you want to give away?), but maybe I'll put on some music and start a swatch tonight. Once I get a knitting project restarted, it will help me unwind when I come off my strike which will probably be tomorrow. For now I'll put the house to bed and let the kids figure out the rest themselves. They might be mighty tired tomorrow, but some lessons are best learned the hard way--especially since they don't like to learn it any other way.

Knitting needles, here I come... (that's if I don't get hung up elsewhere...)

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Turning off the Task Master

I'm sitting around the house today still trying to clear this cold that's holding my sinuses captive. When my head hurts from coughing up junk with little results, it doesn't work well. It takes much longer to engage gears and often what comes out is below par. I guess this is a time for a much needed break.

I don't give myselfs breaks often enough. There are always many demands and I've grown to think it's unacceptable to rest when things need to be done. Yet even Jesus called His disciples away to rest for awhile so they wouldn't grow weary. The book of Ecclesiastes points out that there is no an end to work and toiling over it is weary to the soul. Boy do I know it!

So while I'm battling this cold, I think I'll turn off my inner task master, grab some knitting needles and start those baby socks I've been wanting to try. Who knows? Maybe I'll actually be able to sit and watch American Idol for a change instead of catching snippets while doing dishes or folding clothes.

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There is a spring after winter

We're all still trying to recover from the cruds, but the kids for the most part are better. Only a few lingering coughs and runny noses. I've had a cold for the past two weeks that's reinforced itself, though. I initially lost my voice, but now I'm on my second round of cold cruds, only this time it's a bit worse. Super pressurized sinuses and a crummy chest cough. But I'm healthy otherwise and therefore thankful. This too will pass.

The house sits untended as we figure out what to work on next. We're now considering finishing one floor so we can have more room to move around. It's getting very cramped in our trailer. However, I think we should finish the top floor because that's where the main rooms are like the kitchen, but Jim thinks we should finish the bottom floor and put in a makeshift kitchen because it's cheaper to insulate. I think it would cost us more in the long run. The way I look at it, we don't have the money for either right now. Might as well believe God for the little extra up front to finish the top floor where everything is in their proper places instead.

I'm doing a bit better in my mind that I had been. I had lost hope of moving in at all, but now when I look out at the unfinished house, I see myself standing in one of the windows. We will be in there some day. I don't know how long it will take, but it will happen. That's a huge improvement in me for which I'm grateful. It's no fun living with hope sapped. However it comes, there is a spring after winter and flowers will bloom. We will live in our new house some time in the future.

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Facing My Issues with the House

Now that my blog is redesigned, it's time to post, and I realize I have issues to face with our unfinished house.

Those who have followed along for awhile know that in the latter half of 2005 we ran out of construction money from our old house we sold a few years ago. (And wouldn't you know it, when that happened, I seemed to run out of posts.) It wouldn't have been an issue if we had taken out a loan, but right from the start we knew we wouldn't. Or I should say we couldn't. It wasn't because we were being prideful in wanting to say we built a house without contracting out most of the work or getting loans. It was because we knew we didn't have the financial resources all year round be able to pay off a loan--or even qualify for one. It left us stuck. Stuck to do most everything ourselves and stuck to believe God.

Ooo. Did I just hear that right? Stuck to believe God? Like that should be the last thing people do?

It's sad to say, but it's true. When faced with decisions we always gravitate toward whatever we can easily do ourselves, and only when we have no choices, do we feel forced to believe God. I can prefer to call it a challenge, but if I'm being honest, I have to admit I felt forced. In fact, I didn't even believe at the beginning that Jim could build a house by himself until God showed me that it was much like constructing a novel.

So here I am now, feeling the pressure of our financial confinement that wasn't our choice. And where I started out feeling forced to believe God, I actually started to believe God could do it and my attitude changed so I turned to see it as a challenge. That was easier when we still had money to buy supplies and I saw progress happening on the house. When it ran out, though, that "challenge" faded back to "stuck." In other words, my belief faded into doubt, and doubt turned into unbelief so I felt doomed to forever live in our falling apart trailer with now eight people instead of just seven like two months ago.

Bitterness crept in...

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